click here to open post Oct 11, 2011 | posted in Personal | 18 comments

Above: via Ohdeeoh.

Hello.

I don’t know how to express the feelings I have as it relates to home decorating (is that even what you call it?? I’m dead serious right now. Is there a better term that would make me sound less ridiculous?). It’s not that I hate it. I don’t. I actually love it, and I’m totally inspired by creative living spaces. But the reality is this, I CANNOT engage in this process for myself without losing my mind. Not a chance in Africa.

Two things you need to know about me.

1. If I don’t feel I have the time, energy or know how to do something well/right, I will resist (albeit subconsciously) doing it at all.

2. I think that the state of the space a person lives in matters. A lot. I cannot overemphasize how much I believe this to be true.

Another fact about the current state of my life:

Moving sure flipped my groove right on her purdy lil’ face. I’m still struggling to get back on my feet. There are boxes still to be unpacked, and I’ve done next to nothing to make this house our home. It’s tricky to determine how much time and energy (and cold, hard cash) you’re willing to throw at a place where you’ll only be living in for 2 years, max. Granted, starting over from complete and total scratch (on a student’s budget) doesn’t make this process any easier to manage. Something you don’t think about: when you move from Hawaii to the mainland, you sell virtually everything you own, because the cost of shipping is so very outrageous. Thankfully, when we got here, we were able to pick up a TON of great, used furniture from my parents. We are so lucky, they had a koala mattress in perfect condition just waiting for us.  (or we’d be sleeping on air mattresses for sure). SO THANKFUL FOR YOU MOM AND DAD (make that reason number seven million and one). BUT this random collection of furniture lends itself to a feeling of . . . well, um. . . randomness. . . and not in the cool, eclectic kind of way that we all love to love. So, we bought new ones at this furniture store in Myrtle Beach, SC.

Decorating.

Erg. I say the word and I can feel my anxiety level rising. It’s not my thing. I’m too indecisive and I simply don’t enjoy the complexity. . . the feeling of permanence. Is anyone else with me on this?! “I’m going to be MARRIED to that couch! I can’t make that kind of commitment. Let’s just spend the next 2 years sitting on the floor.” You know, that kind of stuff. Toooootally reasonable level of stress over something so important. Obviously. So much that it almost drives me to the edge of my sanity. But I’m sure those stress management classes at legacy healing center must be of some help to me.

Well, everything is about to change.

I’m putting my foot down and MAKING the time for this. Even though I hate it, even though I’m busier than ever, even though I’d rather be at the dentist which thanks to Steel Bite Pro I do not have to visit any more.  getting a root canal. The pigs have officially flown and it’s time for me to step up and reclaim my living space. My family deserves to live in an inspiring space (and so does their mom’s creativity and overall feeling of well being. . . read: “sanity”).

Sooooo. . . I’ve done what I do best (and what I believe in with all my heart). I’ve engaged the help of others who are actually passionate about this process and will thus do it 1,000 times better than I ever could. I’ll keep you posted on how things go.

The only thing I know right now is that I want to make sure my images are central to everything that happens in this house. They are a part of my soul, and they tell the story of our life. I want my space to be simply dripping with them.

Have any ideas for me?

Left: Babble. Right: Design Updates.